Saturday, September 10, 2005

Life is Sideways

Autumn is almost here! One of my favorite times of the year, and definately the best season in Washington. Nice non-humid weather, fewer tourists.
One of the best things to do isn't in DC, however, but a few hours away in the mountains. I am looking forward to more roadtrips to the Shenandoah Valley. Apples and pumpkins, the leafs changing colors. Oh, and more wineries than I can count.

Images from last year's Shenandoah trek... apple picking, feeding goats, hiking in the woods...

I am looking to plan some winery explorations, if anyone is interested. The only question now is who will be doing the driving...because i know it won't be me! Don't want to drive off the edge of a mountain, now do I?

And speaking of wineries, I highly reccomend the movie "Sideways," which is all about misadventures through California's Wine Country. Maybe one day I can open up my own vineyard, Chateaux Adam.

Ex and the City

Ok, on to a more serious topic. You might need a glass of wine for this. It's about my ex... ok three exes back, but by far the most powerful and memorable one. Lately we've been talking everyday, probably on account that we're both at work not too far from eachother, and it's a small city sometimes.
I don't think I've ever felt this ambivilently about someone ever. I've learned it's possible to both love and want to murder someone all at the same moment.

I guess what's been hurting the most lately is seeing him and how he treats the new men in his life. It's not's too late for even that. But it still upsets the hell out of me when I see what a great boyfriend he can be to a man...and then wonder why he never made the effort for me.
Why was I not worth it? Why couldn't he be that man for me, when I deserved it?

Of course, it's taken me awhile to learn that there really is nothing wrong with me. Plenty of other guys see my worth. But why was I worth treating like shit, when other guys get the affection and attention that I equally deserved, especially when I gave nothing but real and honest love?
There was nothing wrong with me then, nor is there now. He's an asshole, pure and simple. And a tiger can't change his stripes.

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