Wednesday, October 07, 2009

Time to Leave This Funhouse

Last night I overheard P!nk's latest song "Funhouse"

"This used to be a Funhouse / But now it's full of evil clowns / it's time to start the countdown..."

I learned from a close friend this weekend that he's chosen to move back to Europe, and while he will be missed, I can't entirely blame him, either.

Maybe I'm coming at this from a different perspective, but as a young gay man, the U.S. has consistently been a disappointment. My home country, yes, but you'll have to excuse me if my patriotism is in short supply these days. Or rather, if I had full rights, then I'd feel differently. But at this point any bones thrown to the gay community in the U.S. is "a day late and a dollar short." The U.S. had to be dragged kicking in screaming into the civil rights era - long after most other developed nations (excluding South Africa) had addressed the race issue. And so it goes with gay rights. There is a fundamentally reactionary part of this country I really, truly hate - mostly because they hate me, people who think like me, and they will do anything to stop us. They ban gay marriage, protest and blow up abortion clinics, and vote against health care.

Which brings me to my disclosure: it's been a quasi-secret that my boyfriend and I have discussed moving to abroad for awhile. At first it began as a an idea to toy with, the with time, and my disappointment with sweet-tongued false-promise Democrats, the more I've become committed to moving somewhere better.

My boyfriend and I have looked at many options, and are strongly leaning towards Canada. We've being doing research on immigrations categories and requirements, and learning what steps we need to take. It may be co$tly, but when I think about the future life I want to have, I want to have my civil protections and live in a place that is welcoming. To quote that stupid Paula Cole song from the '90's, "I don't want to wait for our lives to be over" before equality comes to the U.S. I'm feeling done with this place, done with these people who live in an imperialistic bubble, done with the religious fanaticism, done with the discrimination. I'm tired of Democrats telling me to wait and be patient. Patience left Adamtown about four years ago.

So - best of luck to my friend who is moving, and I am hopeful about my own move. It may take time (I am looking at at least a year to get everything in order!) and money, but it is something I/we want. This year has brought so many changes and eye-opening moments. D.C. has been a wonderful place to me - I am grateful for the experiences I have had and the friends I've made and hope to keep for life. But I feel this calling to leave, and it's time to start planning and packing and leave this "funhouse."

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