The Poison Pen

Moving on...

2011-01-25T21:38:00.002-05:00

If you haven't noticed, I haven't touched this blog in a good while. I've been busy living life, and going through changes, as always.

I am plans to start up a new blog, starting afresh with a new chapter. I will be sure to place the forwarding link here and let you all know when that happens.

Thanks to everyone who read and enjoyed my blog over the years!

XO,
Adam

Feeling Pride

2010-06-13T20:31:00.003-04:00

Sunday afternoons, especially in the summer, tend to make me nostalgic. In fact any time after a fun weekend or vacation when going "back to reality" looms, or the end of summer, makes me nostalgic. Where I'm going with this is that I had a wonderful Pride weekend and was just thinking about all the Pride weekends past - the people I've had as friends in this city, the formative experiences I've had here as a young (now not-so-young) gay man.

Actually I only have to work Monday, then I'm taking the rest of the week off with Sean to spend at Provincetown for some much-needed rest and relaxation. I'm really, really looking forward to it. We'll be staying with two friends who've gotten a house...I'm hoping the weather is nice!

Thursday night was a friend of Sean's birthday party, so we went to that. Saturday we watched the parade (was it just me or did this year feel like it dragged on for 3 hours?) visited some friends, went to dinner at Logan Tavern, out for drinks after that. Today we met two friends and went to the street festival - got drenched in the brief downpour! And why is Pride always during a hot time of year? It always seems lethally hot down at the street fair, but I guess some boys just like the excuse to go shirtless, is my guess.

Summer is finally here, it would seem. I have been debating keeping this blog active anymore. I can't explain it, but sometimes I think it's served its purpose. Maybe I'll start a new one, or...

May-be I'll Update

2010-05-26T13:35:00.002-04:00

I was eating with a friend a week or so ago and they asked me what was up with my blog, and I realized I've been far too busyto update it like I should. Plenty has happened in the last month, and I'll post some photos soon.

Things I've been up to: Work's been crazy, but have been trying to enjoy my weekends and seeing friends when I can. Sean and I have been looking at moving somewhere together. Taking some time off next month to go with him to Provincetown, maybe visit my friend in Halifax, too, at some point. I've been taking a French class at the Alliance Française two nights a week, just for fun. I had jury duty this month (hopefully it'll be a long while before that again). Sean gave me "permission" finally to get a motorcycle, and we still talk about moving in with eachother (not that the two are somehow related...), and I've donw a lot of shopping. I think that about sums it all up.

My family's bugging me to come visit this Memorial Day weekend at some point - not sure what I am going to do yet, beyond spend soem time with Sean. À Bientôt!

An Interesting Article...

2010-04-28T09:18:00.000-04:00

Do Gay Couples Give Up Their U.S. Citizenship?

American expatriates are having a more difficult time living and working abroad, a recent Times article found, causing a small but growing number of them to renounce their United States citizenship.

But there’s another group of Americans who could be adding to that tally: same-sex couples.
Many same-sex couples who decide to leave the United States head for countries that recognize their unions. In fact, when we wrote a story about the extra costs same-sex couples face here in America, we learned that many leave because of immigration obstacles.

Several readers left comments stating that they could not sponsor their same-sex partners for American citizenship — so they decided to migrate to places like Canada, where it’s easier to gain permanent resident status for couples since only one partner has to qualify. Besides, gay marriage is recognized there.

Not all same-sex couples who move abroad will ultimately renounce their citizenship, of course, but it’s not out of the realm of possibility.

David Cohen, a senior partner at Campbell Cohen, an immigration law firm in Montreal, said he had seen a significant increase in the number of same-sex couples who emigrated from the United States to Canada over the last 10 years.

The couples head north for many reasons, he said, including “what they view as a prejudicial tax system, or they don’t feel they are entitled to the same benefits as heterosexual married couples, or they feel there is more tolerance,” Mr. Cohen said. “And there have been a fair number of Americans who can include their same-sex partner in the application. Only one member of a couple has to qualify for permanent residence status to come to Canada.”

The following readers, who commented on our October story about the costs of being gay, echoed those sentiments:

Rich and Luis, of Vancouver, wrote:
Heterosexuals can sponsor their partners to become U.S. permanent residents; same-sex couples cannot. My now-husband and I had to move to Canada to stay together. We were both professionals in our native countries. Now my husband, a medical technologist, is working at Staples, and I’m making $25,000 less annually with poor benefits at a temporary job with no job security, although at least the job is in my field. It was expensive to become permanent residents, and the move was expensive, as are trips back to see my family.

Megan, of Canada, said:
Try being a bi-national gay couple. We have paid over $70,000 to be together. My partner is Indian and I am American and yet we have to live in Canada if we are to be together.

And Rebecca, of New Jersey:
My wife and I have been together for 5 years and I am in the process of becoming a Canadian permanent resident so that we can live in the same country. It has cost nearly $10,000 so far.

Mr. Cohen said he did not know whether any of his same-sex couple clients ultimately renounced their American citizenship. American transplants may be less likely to do so in Canada because of a tax treaty between the two countries, which lessens the burden of double taxation that many American expats pay in other countries, he added.

Many of the renunciations cited by the Times article were attributed to the issue of double taxation, which has irked many expats for years. Another big reason expats have renounced is because it’s becoming more challenging to keep an American bank account because of new banking regulations aimed at curbing tax evasion and preventing money from flowing to terrorists.

The article says that 502 expatriates gave up their United States citizenship or permanent residency status in the last quarter of 2009, the largest quarterly figure in years, and more than twice the total for all of 2008. There were 743 renunciations last year.

How many of those renunciations do you think might have been same-sex couples? What choices do couples with noncitizen partners have — and what are the costs?

Birthday and everything after...

2010-04-23T15:51:00.002-04:00

So I had a great birthday weekend, thanks to all of my friends who made it special : )You can check out the photos here. Flowers, candy, presents, drinks, friends... it was very nice and we had great weather, too. It's strange to think this is the last year of my twenties. I have a feeling I have to make it count somehow.

One friend is thinking of a trip to Europe next month, which I may go on. I've been singing up for new things, like a French class that starts soon, as well as other things like a kayaking course with Sean. Just things to get out, meet people, stay active etc.

Here is the newest from one of my fav singers, Sarah McLachlan (well, before she went through her period of "Adult Contemporary" snoozers). It looks like she might be coming back with good music again!

Spring Sprang Sprung

2010-04-12T20:37:00.003-04:00

It's been a great week since I last posted. Easter/My early birthday went fine with my family. I have a new assistant at work who is a lifesaver. On Wednesday night Sean surprised me by taking me to a chocolate truffle making class at ACKC Cocoa Bar on 14th St (which, by the way, has amazing hot chocolates for cold nights and lavender lemonade for the warmer days). I actually just finished eating the truffles we made. I think I need to go to more cooking classes, I forgot how much fun they are. In fact, I think I need to start doing more events like that; break out of my bubble and meet new people.

Saturday I went to sushi with Sean and we went to Cobalt, which was shockingly busy, and we had a really good time with each other. The next day we checked out a new Korean place (people know how I am about my Korean...) called Hee Been. I was really impressed and definitely would go back! And here I was thinking I had been to every Korean joint in a 50-mile radius. You know, kimchi is a serious health food!

Afterward we went to Brookside Gardens in Wheaton. I love that place, and it's always so nice in the spring when all the tulips and such are in bloom.

The Easter Brady Visits Again!

2010-04-04T10:37:00.000-04:00

Eastertime

2010-04-03T11:29:00.000-04:00

It's that time of yer again. I'm going with Sean over to my parents' house for Easter tomorrow and to celebrate the far more important holiday, my birthday, a little early.

I should add that Sean and I have decided not to move in together. I know, it seems like an emotional roller coaster around this whole moving-in-together thing. And I suppose that's part of the reason I thought maybe it would be a better idea to shelve the idea for now. I think Sean was overwhelmed with work this month, other things going on in his life, and the fact that he's never lived with a partner before. For my part, I have to admit I'm a little sad to leave where I am now, and I'm not sure if Sean and I would be compatible living together or not. I know there's only one way to find out, but the status quo seems to have worked for the last 3 1/2 years. The whole thing came to a head on Thursday when I would have to give 30 days notice to my current apartment building that I planned on moving out by May 1st. Sean suggested moving the moving date back to June. But I feel like we keep pushing dates, so there's clearly some issues that need to be addressed. Hence, I suggested it might be less stressful for both of us if we just took the idea off the table for awhile and revisit it at some point in the future.

Cherry Blossoms 2010

2010-04-02T11:37:00.002-04:00

I forgot to blog about last weekend, I realized. It's been a hectic week at work (what;s new there?) but I had a lot of fun last weekend. I went to the Cherry Blossoms at the Tidal Basin with M and Sean (see below). They were really at peak and very pretty. That whole area was also really packed - the Metro was a nightmare (nothing new there consider it is DC's "Underground FAILroad"). And honestly I think it'll be the closest I get to the Mall until after the summer & all the tourists go home.

I got a splitting migraine later that evening, but after some pills I went to dinner with Sean and we met up with P & B at Omega (or as Sean has dubbed it, "The Island of Misfit Toys") and then we went to Apex - which I hadn't been to in ages.The next day was kind of cool and wet, and we didn't really do much of anything except go to an Asian grocery store (I always buy so much there) in Fairfax that I love and have dinner. Weekends always seem to go by way too fast.

We've started getting very serious in our efforts to find jobs in other cities/countries. I don't want to jinx anything, but it feels good to actually do something as opposed to talking (or blogging) about it.

The Countdown Begins...

2010-03-30T15:17:00.003-04:00

I have to admit, as I've posted before, I'm a little aprehensive about moving in with Sean, especially now that today marks a month until we move in together. It's refreshing, in its own weird way, to know that he feels the same way too. It's a scary thing. We considered the need for more time, which I am still open to (of course I need some definitive decision because there is planning that has to be done!). But as of today we are still moving forward.

It will be such an adjustment, I know, for both of us. I got a little sad, in fact, hanging out with some friends last night. I was wondering how living with Sean will affect my social life and other things. He promises me nothing will have to change, but I wonder.

April Showers Bring...

2010-03-30T15:12:00.001-04:00

Some February/March Photos

2010-03-23T17:44:00.004-04:00

Above: open kitchen at Ping Pong in Chinatown, Sharkey in the DJ booth at Saint-Ex, me at the Asian art museum, P at Town

Lady Gaga - Telephone

2010-03-22T21:54:00.001-04:00

Spring Awakening

2010-03-21T22:02:00.002-04:00

I've had a nice last couple of weekends. Even work wasn't that painful with my boss being out of the office all week. The weather's gotten warm, and I've been going out a lot the last few weekends. I think I was endanger of becoming a nester, but I've felt like reconnecting with friends I've been drifting from. I feel good.

I'm still moving in with Sean, probably May. We've been discussing parameters of the situation. I know I've written a little about my fears of being tied down in this place, or the fear of finding myself unhappy. I think we've reached an understanding and I don't feel so potentially trapped anymore.

Friday night I went bar hopping with M, which I haven't done in a long time. The next day Sean got off work early and we went to this new place in Chinatown called Ping Pong that does dim sum that we both really enjoyed. Afterwards we went to Town for Lady Gaga night. Today we enjoyed the warm weather and went to Great Falls for a picnic - it's been a very nice weekend. I'm feeling better about a lot of things.

Peaches - Billionaire

2010-03-21T22:00:00.001-04:00

I think Peaches is probably the best thing to come out of Toronto...

Drunky, Did You Move to Connecticut?

2010-03-19T16:43:00.000-04:00

Green... with Envy: St. Patrick's Day 2010!

2010-03-17T09:04:00.000-04:00

Happy St. pAAtrick's Day, everyone!

The Ideas of March

2010-03-15T16:25:00.002-04:00

My HOroscope this morning:

You have a great deal of power at your disposal today, Aries. You should keep in mind that just about anything you wish for will come true. Don't waste words or actions. Concentrate your energy and focus it on one or two important things instead of dispersing it and thereby diluting your overall power. There isn't anything to fear on a day like this.

Interesting. I woke up this morning from an epically-long dream, one that was chock full of symbolism (it's as if my subconscious is trying to beat me over the head with a message). I won't go into it here- that's what I keep my dream journal by my bed for - but it's been an interesting start to the week. Maybe it's the rainy weather, but do you ever have mornings where it's hard to shake dreams and differentiate between the real and unreal?

I had a wonderful weekend. Last weekend I wasn't feeling so great and haven't been out in while, so it felt good to get out of the house. Saturday night I had dinner at Cava with Sean, we met some friends at Mova (formerly Halo), and then some others at Town. With the daylight savings jumping ahead one hour thing, it wasn't until very late when we got back.

The next morning I made breakfast (which Sean and I joke has happened maybe 3 times in our entire relationship) and then we went to see Shutter Island at Tysons, which was a perfect film noir movie for a dark and rainy weekend. I definitely recommend it - tell me your theories on the twist ending. I won't post any spoilers here.

By the way, what are people doing for St. pAAtrick's Day this year?

Stories to Tell

2010-03-01T21:40:00.002-05:00

March is here, and things are getting a little warmer, which gives hope for spring, though honestly I would not be opposed to a little more snow! Having snows days off work is worth it in itself.

I was thinking at some point tonight that when I move I really will miss DC on some level. I was reflecting on some good times I've had over the years. Even some of the crazy things which, while not fun at the time, I can look back on and laugh a little at. The point is, I've lived to tell the tales.

Sometimes I've thought about writing a novel about my time here. I'd have enough raw material to fill up volumes, all the crazy situations, people etc. But I wouldn't even know where to begin! It's nice having that feeling of communion with the city though - I've been privileged to see some of her secrets, and enjoy some very good times through these formative years of my twenties.

That Little Voice...

2010-02-26T13:13:00.002-05:00

While I am very excited about the upcoming move, I have to confess I also have a few moments of panic. It has nothing to do with whether or not I think I could be compatible with Sean or not. It's larger than that, really.

I had sort of a "moment of clarity" today when I realized what I think is the root of some of the issues in our relationship I've had in the past, things that went unnamed because I couldn't wrap my mind around what the root problem was. I really do think, now, that it's about commitment. Or rather, being able to do the things I want in life.

Do you ever have that little voice in your head that says "Run!" ?

I get that sometimes. This is nothing against Sean at all. He really is the most amazing man I've ever found. But, I feel like my "window of opportunity" is drawing to a close - my twenties are almost over. The further you go along the harder it is to change any course. I do not want to be in the same place doing the same things two, five, ten years from now. Wondering where those years went, much as I do now having lived in DC for a decade.

I've learned how easy it is to let years pass under the bridge... putting things off, putting dreams on the shelf. I don't want to do that. And sometimes I think it's even easier to fall into that hypnosis of mundane life when you tie yourself with another person.

Some days I want to run, I want to move far away and start fresh. And I think it's perfectly human to feel that way. I think a lot of us have these feelings in our relationships, even if we bury them somewhere dark and secret.

When you ask me tomorrow I may feel completely different. My blog can be silly sometimes, but I also come here to work out issues (albeit in a rather public forum). But I have to be honest with how I feel, and it helps to get it out on words...

A Moment for Reflection...

2010-02-25T15:02:00.003-05:00

A strange selection for a cold winter day, I realize, but I came across this reading about a colleague who quoted this in an article... at any rate, I really was struck by the last two lines.

The Summer Day
Mary Oliver

Who made the world?
Who made the swan, and the black bear?
Who made the grasshopper?
This grasshopper, I mean-
the one who has flung herself out of the grass,
the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,
who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down-
who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.
Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.
Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.
I don't know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down
into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,
how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,
which is what I have been doing all day.
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?

Catching Up

2010-02-24T13:41:00.004-05:00

Not much major has happened since my past post. Valentine's was nice, the snow is almost melted. I've seen my friends several times (though I've actualyl been more of a homebody than usual lately!)

Sean and I are continuing to plan our moving in with each other. I haven't set a date as of yet, but I imagine it will be soon. Sean has some repairs and remodeling to finish up.

Soon I'll be a Real Housewife of McLean lol

Great Lake Swimmers : Your Rocky Spine

2010-02-24T13:41:00.001-05:00

Year of the Tiger

2010-02-13T16:12:00.003-05:00

It's Valentine's Day tomorrow, and also Chinese New Year, year of the tiger. Tonight I'm going to dinner with Sean to Mon Ami Gabi - it was where we celebrated our first Valentine's together (and, if I recall, it was snowy then, too). This makes our fourth Valentine's day, now.

Last night was the opening ceremonies of the Winter Olympics in Vancouver. Wish I was there to see it all in person. I did catch the ceremonies on TV last night while I was out. It was beautiful (though a tough act to follow after Beijing's in 2008). I liked the giant polar bear that came out of the floor...

Edward Cullen at My House

2010-02-13T16:02:00.004-05:00

I don't know what I love more about this pic - my favorite sparkly vampire from Twilight, or the polar bear rug he's laying on. Actually screw Robert Pattinson, I'll take the rug.

Snowverkill

2010-02-08T23:44:00.002-05:00

I wished for some snow this winter, and I certainly did get it! It snowed last weekend, and then there was a massive snowstorm this weekend (17 inches roughly). More snow is expected tomorrow night, to boot!

Sean was snowed in with me the last three days. You know, it was really nice. We cooked for each other, watched movies, played in the snow... it was fun.

So before I go any further, I have to mention the events of last weekend. So after the snow, last Sunday, Sean and I went to Lowes to look at tiles and stuff for renovating his condo. All that flood damage from December has been fixed now, and he has some money left over that he's going to put into making the place nicer. Anyway, he was looking at dishwashers and asking me what I thought. I was like, this one's nice, but it's your place, so you make the decision. Then he basically said it's our place, and he would like me to live with him, and I said yes.

That's pretty much how it happened. I'll never forget the dishwasher section of Lowes. Sigh. There's no real timetable yet on when I'll actually move. We both have loose ends to tie up, we're both very busy. But this weekend snowed in together I think proved we really can live with each other without driving the other crazy, so that's a good thing.

Definition of the Day

2010-02-03T07:49:00.002-05:00

Yesterday, Groundhog Day, the groundhog Phil saw his shadow, so maybe six more weeks of winter? There was a lot of snow, but unfortunately the streets are clear (for once) so I have to work today!

At any rate, here's something humorous I came across. Lada Gaga fans will appreciate this:

"Bluffin with my Muffin" - the offering of a baked good to distract your enemies so that you can make a quick escape.

'I was cornered my thieves on a dark, deserted street, and only managed to escape by bluffin' with my muffin (blueberry).'

Back, But Wishing I Weren't

2010-01-25T21:47:00.002-05:00

I've been back for a few days. While on some level it's good to be back in one's own home and bed, I gotta be honest, I'd much rather be in a beach in the Yucatan.

Sean and I had a wonderful time. On many levels I think it was our best trip yet. After the turbulence and stress of last year we both needed it. The first four or so days, in fact, were spent just lounging by the beach. There's something delightful about swimming in bath-warm water and sun tanning in the dead of January. Margaritas, coronas, relaxing.

We visited Mayan ruins, which have to be seen to be believed. As with other ancient wonders I've had the privilege of seeing, nothing really compares to that first moment of awe when you stand before something amazing, such as a Mayan pyramid.

We went snorkeling and swimming at a protected reef area that was absolutely beautiful, too. I took pictures with a water-proof camera (I'll have those developed shortly). The water was so blue and transparent it makes our trips to cold, murky Rehoboth just seem depressing. Sean and I got lots of good sun, too.

Now, I suppose, it's time to get "serious" about this year!

0

Vamos a Mexico!

2010-01-12T18:39:00.002-05:00

The Poison Pen is off for the next eight days to Mexico to enjoy warmer climes and celebrate a new year! Adios!

The Melting of America The Story of a Can’t-Do Nation

2010-01-08T11:16:00.000-05:00

Tomgram: Orville Schell, What Doesn't Work in America TomDispatch

The Melting of America The Story of a Can’t-Do Nation By Orville Schell

Lately, I’ve been studying the climate-change induced melting of glaciers in the Greater Himalaya. Understanding the cascading effects of the slow-motion downsizing of one of the planet’s most magnificent landforms has, to put it politely, left me dispirited. Spending time considering the deleterious downstream effects on the two billion people (from the North China Plain to Afghanistan) who depend on the river systems -- the Yellow, Yangtze, Mekong, Salween, Irrawaddy, Brahmaputra, Ganges, Indus, Amu Darya and Tarim -- that arise in these mountains isn’t much of an antidote to malaise either.

If you focus on those Himalayan highlands, a deep sense of loss creeps over you -- the kind that comes from contemplating the possible end of something once imagined as immovable, immutable, eternal, something that has unexpectedly become vulnerable and perishable as it has slipped into irreversible decline. Those magnificent glaciers, known as the Third Pole because they contain the most ice in the world short of the two polar regions, are now wasting away on an overheated planet and no one knows what to do about it.

To stand next to one of those leviathans of ice, those Moby Dicks of the mountains, is to feel in the most poignant form the magnificence of the creator’s work. It’s also to regain an ancient sense, largely lost to us, of our relative smallness on this planet and to be forcibly reminded that we have passed a tipping point. The days when the natural world was demonstrably ascendant over even the quite modest collective strength of humankind are over. The power -- largely to set an agenda of destruction -- has irrevocably shifted from nature to us.

Another tipping point has also been on my mind lately and it’s left me no less melancholy. In this case, the Moby Dick in question is my own country, the United States of America. We Americans, too, seem to have passed a tipping point. Like the glaciers of the high Himalaya, long familiar aspects of our nation are beginning to feel as if they were, in a sense, melting away.

The eight years of George W. Bush’s wrecking ball undeniably helped set our descent in motion. Then came the dawning realization that President Barack Obama, who strode into office billed as a catalyst of sure-fire change, would no more stop the melting down of the planet’s former “sole superpower” than the Copenhagen summit would stop the melting of those glaciers. After all, a predatory and dysfunctional Washington reminds us constantly that we may be approaching the end of the era of American possibility. For Obama’s beguiling aura of promise to be stripped away so unceremoniously has left me feeling as if we, as a country, might have missed the last flight out.

And speaking of last flights out, I’ve been on a lot of those lately. It’s difficult enough to contemplate the decline of one’s country from within, but from abroad? That -- take my word for it -- is an even more painful prospect. Because out there you can’t escape an awareness that what’s working and being built elsewhere is failing and being torn apart here. To travel is to be forced to make endless comparisons which, when it comes to our country, is like being disturbed by unnerving dreams.

In the past few months, as I’ve roamed the world from San Francisco to Copenhagen to Beijing to Dubai, I’ve taken to keeping a double-entry list of what works and what doesn’t, country by country. Unfortunately, it’s largely a list of what works “there” and doesn’t work here. It’s in places like China, South Korea, Sweden, Holland, Switzerland, and (until recently) the United Arab Emirates -- some not even open societies -- that you find people hard at work on the challenges of education, transport, energy, and the environment. It’s there that one feels the sense of possibility, of hopefulness, of can-do optimism so long associated with the U.S.

China, a country I’ve visited more than 100 times since 1975, elicits an especially complicated set of feelings in me. After all, it’s got a Leninist government which was not supposed to succeed; and yet, despite all predictions, it managed to conjure up an economic miracle that, whatever you may think about political transparency, the rule of law, human rights, or democracy, delivers big time. When you’re there, you can feel an unmistakable sense of energy and optimism in the air (along with the often stinging pollution), which, believe me, is bittersweet for an American pondering the missing-in-action regenerative powers of his own country.

As I’ve been traveling from China’s gleamingly efficient airports to our chaotic and all-too-often broken-down versions of the same, or Europe’s high-speed trains to our clunky railroads, I keep that expanding list of mine on hand, my own little version of what works and what doesn’t. Over time, its entries have fallen into one of three categories that I imagine something like this:

1. Robust, full of energy, growing, replete with promise and strength, the envy of the world.
2. Alive and kicking, but in a delicate balance between growth and decline.
3. Irredeemably broken, with little chance of restored health anytime soon.

And here then, as I imagine it, is the shape of America today in terms of what works and what doesn’t, what’s growing and what’s failing:

1. Bio-technology, developing dynamically and delivering much of the world’s most innovative technological research, thinking, and ideas; Silicon Valley, which still has enormous inventiveness, energy, and capital at its disposal; civil society which, despite the collapse of the economy, still seems to be expanding, still luring the best and brightest young people, and still superbly performing the ever more crucial function of being a goad to government and other established institutions; American philanthropy, which is the most evolved, well-funded, and innovative in the world; the U.S. military, the best led, trained, equipped, and maintained on the planet, despite the way it has been repeatedly thrust into hopeless wars by stupid politicians; the fabric of much of small-town American life with its still extant sense of cohesiveness and community spirit; the arts, both high-culture and pop, boasting a still vibrant film industry that remains the globe’s “sole superpower” of visual entertainment, and the requisite networks of symphony orchestras, ballets, theaters, pop music groups, and world-class museums.

2. Higher and secondary-school education, in which America still boasts some of the globe’s preeminent institutions, though the best are increasingly private as jewel-in-the-crown public systems like California’s are driven into the ground thanks to devastating, repeated budget cuts; a national energy system which still delivers, but is terminally strung out on oil and coal, and depends on a grid badly in need of some new “smartness”; environmental protection, which compares favorably with that in other countries, though always under-funded and so, like our extraordinary national park system, ever teetering above the abyss; the court system, overburdened and under-funded, but struggling to deliver justice.

3. The federal government, essentially busted; Congress, increasingly paralyzed and largely incapable of delivering solutions to the country’s most pressing problems; state government, largely broke; the Interstate highway system and our infrastructure of bridges and tunnels, melting away like a block of ice in the sun because maintenance and upgrading is so poor; dikes, water systems, and many other aspects of the national infrastructure which keeps the country going, similarly old and deteriorating; airlines, some of the sorriest in the world with the oldest, dirtiest, and least up-to-date planes and the requisite run-down airports to go with them; ports that are falling behind world standards; a railroad passenger system which, unlike countries from Spain to China, has not one mile of truly high-speed rail; the country’s financial system whose over-paid executives not only ran us off an economic cliff in 2008, but also managed to compromise the whole system itself in the eyes of the world; a broadcast media which -- public broadcasting and aspects of a vital and growing Internet excepted -- is a grossly overly-commercialized, broken-down mess that has gravely let down the country in terms of keeping us informed; newspapers, in a state of free-fall; book publishing, heading in the same direction; elementary education (that is, our future), especially public K-12 schools in big cities, desperately under-funded and near broke in many communities; a food industry which subsidizes sugar and starch, stuffs people with fast-food, and leaves 60% of the population overweight; basic manufacturing, like the automobile industry, evidently headed for oblivion, or China, whichever comes first; the American city, hollowing out and breaking down; the prison system, one of America’s few growth industries but a pit of hopelessness.

As you may have noted, category one is close to a full list, category two, close enough, while category three is just a gesture in the direction of larger-scale decline. Unfortunately, it seems ever expandable. You’ll undoubtedly be tempted to add to it yourself. (I have the same impulse every time I’m elsewhere and see some shiny new industrial or designer toy we don’t make or even have.) When I told a friend about this tallying obsession of mine, he suggested that it might turn out to be a great website. (See the vigorous world of the Internet in category one above.) And so it might -- a kind of electronic stock market Big Board where the world could weigh in and help track all those things people find encouraging or discouraging about the U.S. and other countries.

The initial impulse for my list, however, was self-protective. I was searching for “things that work” here, the better to banish that dispiriting sense of an American decline into the sort of can’t-do-itive-ness that Congress has come to exemplify. Consider my exercise some kind of incantatory ritual -- a talisman -- meant to hold off the bad spirits just as, when I arrive in Beijing in winter and find the mercury near zero (an increasing rarity these last years) or stumble into a snowstorm in New York City, I’m relieved. For me, such manifestations of real winter are signs that nature may not yet have totally surrendered to us, that global warming is still being challenged, and that things may not be as far gone as I sometimes fear.

And yet that list of can-do’s remains so unbearably short and the cant-do’s grows by the trip. I’d love to be convinced otherwise, but like the ice fields of the Greater Himalaya melting before our eyes, American prowess and promise, once seemingly as much a permanent part of the global landscape as glaciers, mountains, and oceans, seems to be melting away by the day.

Orville Schell is the Director of the Asia Society’s Center on US-China Relations, where he leads a project on climate change and the Tibetan Plateau. He is former Dean of the Graduate School of Journalism at the University of California, Berkeley, the author of many books on China, and a frequent traveler in his various journalistic pursuits.

The Poison Pen At The Movies

2010-01-02T10:03:00.000-05:00

Maybe it's the cold weather, but I've been catching up on a lot of movies on my want-to-see and friends-recommend lists.

So, here are some movies I've watched/rented from Netflix over the last few weeks... Instead of stars I'll rate them with up to five Poison Pen skull-and-crossbones.

Love Song for Bobby Long - I didn't think I'd like this one (my mother recommended it), but wound up really enjoying it, tearing a little at the end. Five skull-and-crossbones.

Let the Right One In - A very different and atmospheric vampire movie from Sweden. A perfect antidote to the Twilight movies. Four skull-and-crossbones.

RocknRolla - I generally enjoy all of ~~Mr Madonna~~ Guy Ritchie's movies, and this one was great. It's supposed to be the first in a trilogy, so I can't wait for the next installment. Five skull-and-crossbones.

In Bruges - Collin Ferrell oozes Irish sex-appeal in this rather slow-paced but quirky movie. Three skull-and-crossbones.

Waltz With Bashir - A movie that alternated between documentary and animation, it's an import from Israel that's quite interesting. Three skull-and-crossbones.

New Moon - Don't laugh. I saw this Twilight sequel in theaters with Chef Tom (I owe you, Sean) because love is taking your boyfriend to see shitty movies with hot actors. I didn't see this for plot or dialogue, just gratuitous shirtless Robert Pattinson and Taylor Lautner. Three skull-and-crossbones just for the shirtlessness.

Año Nuevo, Vida Nueva

2010-01-01T21:22:00.003-05:00

I had a wonderful New Years Eve (and New Year's Eve Eve), ringing in the new year with friends and Chef Tom.

Wednesday I had lunch with M at Alero, then we spent the day window shopping, and went to a dinner party at Erica's. Thursday I spent the day mostly sleeping in (since I've had the week off) cleaning up a bit (I still haven't gotten rid of my xmas tree yet).

Then, I met Chef in Cleveland Park for NYE dinner at a places I hadn't been to before called Sabores, which has a wonderful South American menu. We then had champagne and our giant fortune cookie (see below) - which promises good things, by the way - and we went to Town to dance and count down to the new year.

Today, after getting together rather late, we met M and S in Chinatown for lunch/dinner at this place (see below) where they make their own noodles. I thought it was rather good, and Chinese on the first is a bit of a New Years Day tradition.

New Year, New Decade

2009-12-31T12:14:00.002-05:00

It occurred to me that the new year, which begins tomorrow, is also the beginning of a new decade, as well. Scary how ten years flow by like a swift river.

I had a wonderful Christmas at my family's with "Chef Tom" (pics below). One of the best Xmas's yet. I've been off work all week, savoring the time-off after an incredibly turbulent year. Indeed, the end of a turbulent decade.

Sean/Chef and myself are off to Mexico after next week, which I am very much looking forward to. Happy New Years to everyone!

Festivus Airing of Grievances!

2009-12-23T13:48:00.004-05:00

I think at this point it's getting cliche, me starting each post lately with an apology for not posting in awhile. That seems to happen a lot of late... so all I can say is I'll update this blog when I'm able and feel like it. So check back periodically, you never know what I might post.

We had a beautiful snowstorm over the weekend here in D.C. It effectively shut the region down (though I don't think it was quite as bad as the one back in 2003). I like snow, my knee pains aside, and I think we're due for a snowy winter.

I got my holiday shopping done, my holiday tree is lit and pretty (I finally got a real one this year). Sean and I are preparing to go visit my parents tomorrow...

Most of all I am excited that 2009 is coming to a close. What a BITCH of a year! Let's examine the shiteous things that happened, shall we...

Adam's Festivus Airing of Grievances!

I got laid off my last job (though I got a sweet severance package and a new job that started the week after, so I made bank this year)
My new job, while paying significantly more $, also comes with more demands and stress.
Sean's job stresses him out even more.
My friend got arrested for something that wasn't their fault.
The national economy continued to fucking tank.
Sean and I went through a rough patch around Halloween.
Sean's condo was flooded.

Of course it wasn't all that bad. There were bright spots - the inauguration parties, a fabulous birthday party, a trip to Canada with Sean, a trip to Utah, New York City, Rehoboth.

At any rate, 2010 will bring great new things, I am sure, for all of us! Starting with a trip in early January to Mexico - a great start if I may say so.

Be safe this HOliday season (including you, Drunky, don't drink and drive!).

Happy HOlidays from The Poison Pen!

Happy Festivus in Advance

2009-12-18T20:14:00.001-05:00

America Has Been Worn Down By Anderson Cooper's Striking Blue Eyes (TWX)

2009-12-04T09:52:00.001-05:00

America Has Been Worn Down By Anderson Cooper's Striking Blue Eyes (TWX)

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Good Morning, Baltimore!

2009-11-23T21:43:00.003-05:00

Sean took me to Baltimore this weekend as a surprise getaway. He had told me, "It's something we've talked about" as a clue. That left a whole range of things open. I thought it could be anything from a bed & breakfast to camping.

He got us a very nice room at the Hotel Monaco, we had a fantastic meal at a seafood restaurant called The Oceanaire, hit the nightclub Hippo. The next morning I took him to the Baltimore Aquarium (see pics below) and to Fells Point.

It's been ages since I've been there - which is funny because it's so close. It was a great weekend spending time with Sean, working on things.

Kaiseki

2009-11-23T21:13:00.002-05:00

Been working on things in my personal life, as readers may have been able to tell, so I haven't really written much lately.

Weekend before last Sean and I went to Sushi Taro. We tried going once before, but missed our reservations. Ever since the restaurant re-opened and extensive renovations, I've heard nothing but complaints that the place is now too expensive and pretentious.

So, I went in fully expected to be disappointed. And came out feeling like I'd had one of the top 10 meals I've had in my life.

First, I have to explain that yes, the menu has become very expensive. But, I must also stress the sushi is far more authentic, as are the other dishes. Let's face it - teriyaki and California rolls aren't exactly authentic Japanese, or very high-end for that matter.

We opted for the 11-course Kaiseki meal, which is arranged by the head chef every night based on fresh ingredients. I honestly wish I could remember every dish, but everything - especially the exotic, hard-to-find fresh fish - made it a very memorable experience.

I can't wait to go back... perhaps for a future special occasion.

Excuse My Dancing Skills!

2009-11-17T09:42:00.002-05:00

This is why you should never invite me to your wedding...

Those other people are clearly just jealous of her pole-dancing abilities.

Anniversary

2009-11-08T17:25:00.002-05:00

Last night was Sean and my third anniversary.We went to dinner at the place we first had dinner at, Zaytinya.
We're taking it one day at a time right now, that's all I can really say. And I appreciate it if our friends can respect that process.

Meshes of the Afternoon

2009-11-07T16:54:00.003-05:00

A classic surrealist film from the 1940's - Maya Deren's Meshes of the Afternoon. (I remember watching this, and Salvador Dali's Un Chien Andalou in college)
There's a scene where she watching herself through a window. What made me remember this film was a dream I had recently...

November In Doubt

2009-11-04T19:51:00.001-05:00

I haven't been blogging lately... my sense of humor is kind of muted right now. I've been going through some things I'd rather not air on this trivial blog.

Maybe I'll post about it all later, when things work out, or don't. I think this song explains sort of how I feel lately...

Why We Hate (yet sometimes love) DC

2009-10-29T15:55:00.001-04:00

A new favorite blog to check out, especially if you live in the DC region.

DILF Wednesdays: Michael C. Hall

2009-10-28T22:17:00.003-04:00

Here's a "killer" DILF for this Halloween week which seems to be dragging... Michael C. Hall of Dexter fame. I fell in love with him when he played the main gay character on Six Feet Under, and he DILF-alicious on Dexter...

Happy Birthday Chef Tom Sean!!

2009-10-24T09:18:00.000-04:00

Happy Birthday, Sean!!! Can't wait to celebrate it with you tonight!

Self Control

2009-10-23T10:39:00.002-04:00

I'd forgotten what a hot video this was (it's up there with A-Ha's Take On Me). I was shocked to hear Laura Branigan was dead, so sad! She's part of the reasons I miss the 80's!

Ghosts of the Past, and Things to Come

2009-10-23T10:17:00.003-04:00

So today I am working from my laptop, sitting at Soho cafe. Just sitting here on my laptop - something which I have not done in a long time, brings back a flood of memories. All the times I was here through college, through formative years of my early 20's... this place, the bars, the street all are laden with memories.

I was talking with a friend this morning on email, and we were also talking about a tarot reading we did as a group. Some might not take much stock in such things, but the strange thing was that all of our reading said that the coming year would bring change.

It certainly did. Some good, some bad. But I guess that's the thing... you don't get to choose the hand that fate deals and sometimes it feels like the universe has a dark sense of humor. I guess it's funny sometimes how a simple fortune-telling can carry meaning that isn't apparent at the time. Only in hindsight do we see how much crazy change has occurred.

Spooky Readings

2009-10-22T21:11:00.003-04:00

I've mentioned before that I love October, and Halloween ranks as probably my favorite holiday in the year (well, besides my birthday). So I've been looking for some good Halloween-season movies and books to help get in the mood.

Sean and I saw Paranormal Activity last weekend when it was cold and wet outside. I'm really, I mean really sensitive to motion sickness. These Youtube-ish movies where they can't hold the camera fucking still really bothers me. That aside, I thought it was a great movie right up until the very end, when they fucking ruined it. But I do recommend seeing it. You'll won't sleep so easy the night you watch it, I'm sure!

Anyway, what are some of your favorite seasonal reads? Any recommendations?

3

2009-10-16T18:30:00.000-04:00

It took me two listens to Britney's new song "3" before I realized what she was talking about. I've only had one threesome in my time, and it was a dizz-aster. TMI? Anyway, here's the song from my favorite trainwreck from Kentwood, LA.

La Roux

2009-10-11T21:38:00.001-04:00

I love this video... mostly because I really like her hair! How much product does that take, I wonder?

LA ROUX 'BULLETPROOF' from soyo on Vimeo.

Equality March leader seeks end to 'incrementalism' - Washington Blade: Gay and Lesbian News, Entertainment, Politics and Opinion

2009-10-09T14:57:00.001-04:00

Equality March leader seeks end to ?incrementalism? - Washington Blade: Gay and Lesbian News, Entertainment, Politics and Opinion

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Time to Leave This Funhouse

2009-10-07T11:30:00.000-04:00

Last night I overheard P!nk's latest song "Funhouse"

"This used to be a Funhouse / But now it's full of evil clowns / it's time to start the countdown..."

I learned from a close friend this weekend that he's chosen to move back to Europe, and while he will be missed, I can't entirely blame him, either.

Maybe I'm coming at this from a different perspective, but as a young gay man, the U.S. has consistently been a disappointment. My home country, yes, but you'll have to excuse me if my patriotism is in short supply these days. Or rather, if I had full rights, then I'd feel differently. But at this point any bones thrown to the gay community in the U.S. is "a day late and a dollar short." The U.S. had to be dragged kicking in screaming into the civil rights era - long after most other developed nations (excluding South Africa) had addressed the race issue. And so it goes with gay rights. There is a fundamentally reactionary part of this country I really, truly hate - mostly because they hate me, people who think like me, and they will do anything to stop us. They ban gay marriage, protest and blow up abortion clinics, and vote against health care.

Which brings me to my disclosure: it's been a quasi-secret that my boyfriend and I have discussed moving to abroad for awhile. At first it began as a an idea to toy with, the with time, and my disappointment with sweet-tongued false-promise Democrats, the more I've become committed to moving somewhere better.

My boyfriend and I have looked at many options, and are strongly leaning towards Canada. We've being doing research on immigrations categories and requirements, and learning what steps we need to take. It may be co$tly, but when I think about the future life I want to have, I want to have my civil protections and live in a place that is welcoming. To quote that stupid Paula Cole song from the '90's, "I don't want to wait for our lives to be over" before equality comes to the U.S. I'm feeling done with this place, done with these people who live in an imperialistic bubble, done with the religious fanaticism, done with the discrimination. I'm tired of Democrats telling me to wait and be patient. Patience left Adamtown about four years ago.

So - best of luck to my friend who is moving, and I am hopeful about my own move. It may take time (I am looking at at least a year to get everything in order!) and money, but it is something I/we want. This year has brought so many changes and eye-opening moments. D.C. has been a wonderful place to me - I am grateful for the experiences I have had and the friends I've made and hope to keep for life. But I feel this calling to leave, and it's time to start planning and packing and leave this "funhouse."

DILF Wednesdays: Clive Owen

2009-10-07T11:20:00.004-04:00

I'm not sure if I've featured British actor Clive Owen before, but he's a total DILF. Pictures of hot men always help ease one through the work week.

Don't worry Sean - you're still my only knight in shining armor!

Season of New Things

2009-10-02T10:31:00.003-04:00

It finally feels like autumn outside - the fall is my favorite time of year! It is "the Season of the Witch." ;) I always associate fall with new beginnings. Almost every serious relationship I've had, including my current one with Sean, has begun in the fall (so much for Spring being the season of romance). I think I always associate this time of year with new beginnings because it's when school starts. I've also always loved Halloween.

By the way, what should I be this year? What is everyone doing for Halloween?

Anyway, I guess my point is I really hope this season brings new (and by new, I mean good) things for all of my friends and myself! I was discussing with my friend M over dinner at Cava last Friday (and there's another story with her and the inept DC government, poor thing, but we'll save that for another time) . I was mentioning how 2009 has been a pretty rough ass year for all of us. I know you have to take the bad with the good, but really, I am hoping that good things are on the horizon for all of us.

Best ~~Witches~~ Wishes!

Gore Vidal: ?We?ll have a dictatorship soon in the US? - Times Online

2009-09-30T15:45:00.001-04:00

Gore Vidal: ?We?ll have a dictatorship soon in the US? - Times Online

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Now That He's Part of the Family...

2009-09-28T18:44:00.003-04:00

I really owe Sean for being such a good sport about going apple picking and winery-visiting with my family in the Shenandoah Valley this weekend...

Political Identity as Fashion

2009-09-28T12:48:00.002-04:00

On the Metro recently I got to thinking about flags as fashion statements. One thing particularly endemic to the U.S. is the American flag on everything. In my case, I found myself on a crowded Metro train full of tourists, all of them covered with tacky “I Love DC” shirts or, of course, U.S. flags.

I tried to think of any other country where one would see something like that. Canadians I’ve come across in traveling love to put the maple leaf on their backpacks and suitcases, (it’s as if they are trying desperately to say “I am NOT an American!”… and I can’t blame them) but somehow it doesn’t come across in quite the worshipful way it does when Americans do it. I think there’s also a parallel with Europeans and their national football/soccer shirts. But with us, I feel, it reaches patriotic overkill.

On the crowded metro train I found myself rolling my eyes at the tackiness. But then I realized I’m guilty of flags-as-fashion to a degree myself. It’s no secret I have a thing for Union Jacks. I think for a lot of non-British people it’s a fashion icon that transcends its literal symbolism… maybe our love of British icons has its roots in idolizing the “Swingin’ London” of years past? I have Union Jacks on rugs, belt buckles, shoes (thanks to Ben Sherman), shirts, mugs, etc. Thought I doubt it would be as fun or fashionable where I actually in the U.K.

What passes for an ironic fashion statement in one place has an entirely different meaning somewhere else. Just a musing…

"Adam, are you sure it's not a bit much? I mean, you're bathroom's lovely, but really..."

Productive Day

2009-09-25T15:43:00.002-04:00

I've been very productive, both personally and at work today, which is odd considering it's Friday and usually it's a day I completely blow off, staring at the clock and waiting for the weekend to begin. Actually most of this week has been spent doing just that. Sometimes when I'm overwhelmed with stuff, I fall into an apathetic/catatonic state where I don't have the drive to do anything. Ask me again how I feel next Monday, but for now I'm feeling better overall.

Here's a soup recipe I want to try soon, from the guys who run The Inn at Little Washington. It looks very fall-ish, so maybe I'll be inspired during the day tomorrow... I'll finally get to put my Cuisninart food processor!

Apple Rutabaga Soup

1 stick butter
1 cup onion, chopped
1 cup granny smith apples, peeled, cored and roughly chopped
1 cup rutabaga, peeled and roughly chopped
1 cup butternut squash, peeled seeded and roughly chopped
(I'd use the pre-chopped squash one finds in stores nowadays, cutting butternut squash is a royal pain in the ass.)
1 cup carrots, peeled and roughly chopped
1 cup sweet potato, peeled and roughly chopped
1 qt. chicken stock
2 cups heavy cream
1/4 cup maple syrup
salt & cayenne pepper to taste.

In a large saucepan over medium-hi heat, melt the butter. Add the onion, apple, rutabaga, squash, carrots and sweet potato and cook, stirring occasionally until the onions are translucent. Add the chicken stock and bring to boil. Simmer 20-25 mins, or until all the vegetables are tender.

Puree the veggies in a blender/food processor. Strain through a fine mesh sieve into pot. Add the cream, maple syrup, salt & cayenne. Bring the soup to a simmer and serve.

Long TIme, No Post

2009-09-23T21:55:00.004-04:00

Alright, it's been while since I bothered posting, so here's a pretty picture to make up for it...

Let's see... I went out on Friday with some of Chef Tom's friends to dinner at an oyster bar on 17th st (as a side, I love oysters. I know raw oysters turn some people's stomachs, but I don't care) and then a few drinks. I swear to god we saw a guy with a Kate Gosselin hairdo. For real... I'm still wondering if he was doing as part of a prank or some pre-Halloween thing. I really hope the poor guy wasn't really trying to rock that. Of course the bar was JR's. And no, it was Drunky McDrunkerson in drag. Man with a Kate Gosselin "hairdon't"... I'm an athiest and I'm praying for that dude. Help him, Jeebus! Anywho...

Sunday Chef and I went to the Ukrainian Festival out in Maryland to get in touch with his mother's side-of-the-family roots. There was borscht, pierogies and pivo (beer) to be had!

We also spent the later afternoon at the Mayorga Coffee Factory in Silver Spring. It's funny sometimes, the little things. Like just spending Sunday afternoon having coffee and reading the newspaper together. It was really... just really pleasant in it's own boring yet comfortable way. I can't help but feeling we've reached some turning point in our relationship. You know, the one where reading the paper together feels natural.

When Bears Attack! And other tales

2009-09-11T18:31:00.005-04:00

Thankfully, it seems like Fall is here - my favorite time of year! I've always loved fall - even if it's partially because it's the best season for mens fashion.

Sean and I have both been really stressed at work, but we try to see each other as much as possible after work and on the weekends. We both are unhappy with our jobs, but trying to work on that. We try to have fun when we're together, even if our energy levels are low. I apologize to some friends for whom I've been sort of laying low. It's been a shitty summer, really, from the stress of douchebag former bosses, finding a a new job, finding myself less-than-happy in my new one, it's been a lot of strain.

So sometimes I like to get far away from the city with Sean, whether it be the beach or mountains, and we decided to visit Shenandoah National Park last weekend just to get away and spend some one-on-one time. We decided to explore the trails through the forest and everything was going fine until...

A large adult black bear stumbled into our path, about six feet away. Sean and I, needless to say, froze in our tracks. Now, one would think Eagle Scout Sean would know what to do in the case of a bear encounter... well since it's not something that happens everyday I'll forgive him. (Incidentally, this page tells you the proper steps when facing a black bear. )

As you can guess, we've both lived to tell the tale... the bear lost interest in us and sauntered off into the woods. I put up a brave front for Sean, making him get behind me and such. Let me tell you, if I'd been alone my ass would still be up in a tree somewhere screaming like a girl for help! Oh wait, black bears can climb trees. Shit.

Last night my friends and I went to a fashion/wine event at Sean's restaurant- and thank you for everyone who came, and the water witch for driving! I'm so glad it's the weekend now, though it never feels long enough.

Oh, and in a recent previous post, I was blogging about things I wanted to see in life, and mentioned, among other things, wanting to see the Mayan ruins. Sean reads this blog from time to time, and what does he do? He books us a trip in January to Mexico to go see Chichen Itza! It's very sweet - I love you, Sean! I can't wait!!

It just comes to show the power of blogging ;) I seriously need to get ready - I haven't been to the beach/pool as much as I normally do this summer, so I'm a little on the pasty side. Get me some of Lindsay Lohan's "Sevin Nine" tanning cream STAT!

Summer and Everything After

2009-08-30T20:04:00.003-04:00

First - it's about MFing time... Metro (which in itself is about an unreliable as it train service) claims that by mid-October there will be cell phone service in its underground stations for most carriers. I certainly hope so!

This past week I took advantage of Restaurant Week by trying three new places I hadn't been before...

On Tuesday I went to Blue Ridge in Georgetown with Sean. It's sort of re-imagined Appalachian cuisine, using produce from regional farms. We both really liked our dishes, thinking of it as sort of haute Southern, if that's possible. The service was great and the portions were generous, and we both agreed we'd definitely go back. The secluded outdoor patio was a nice touch, too.
On Wednesday I went to Fire and Sage (if only for the name alone!) with a coworker for lunch. It has some great contemporary dishes that where unique and tasty. I would go back, especially as it's near my office.
Last night I went with Sean to Ceiba. it's one of those place I always see but have never been in. The menu is fusion contemporary Latin/Caribbean, as it claims, "specifically Yucatan, Brazilian, Peruvian, and Cuban." The dishes we had were all really great - the service left something to be desired, but I really liked everything we had, especially the ceviche and pibil pork. I had some sort of tamarind martini which was quite nice, too.

It's been a month now at my new job, which admittedly stresses the fuck out of me some days. So after a long week I went out Friday night with the water witch, who is now back from London (yeah!) and a friend to Cobalt and then Town. August is a funny month in DC when it comes to who's out at the clubs and who isn't. Personally I'd love a vacation right about now, but I have "miles to go" on that one.

Last night after dinner Sean and I really didn't do much... he's stressed at his job, too. We missed M's new bartending over in the H St. corridor, though I hope to make one of the nights soon!

It's hard to believe it's going to be September in one day. Where did the summer go, really?

The List

2009-08-28T09:26:00.001-04:00

Over the years when I was younger, I developed a sort of internal list of things I want to do before I die. Some of them I've done (some multiple times) and some I've yet to accomplish. And just seem strange and don't make any sense, but they are what they are.

Travel through Europe (yes)
Travel through Asia (yes, but I'd like to see more)
Travel through Latin America (yes)
See the Mayan ruins (not yet)
See the Aurora Borealis (not yet)
Fix my teeth (yes - don't laugh, that was on my list)
Live in a large American city (yes, clearly)
Be published in some form (not yet)
Go scuba diving (not yet - snorkeling doesn't count!)
Live outside the U.S. for at least one year (not yet, but working on it)

I'm sure there are others I'm forgetting I may go back an add here later. How about you?

In The Waiting Room

2009-08-27T21:22:00.002-04:00

So an ex boyfriend called me up tonight, out of the blue, and wanted to meet up. I was too far away at the time to meet, but we talked for awhile, reminiscing about years ago, laughing over some of the crazy stories we share.

He expressed to me how he feels like his life isn't go anywhere, or at least in the direction he wants it to go. It really touched on a creeping feeling I've been having lately. This sort of late-twenties life crisis of "now what?"

Like, I'm just not sure what I'm doing with myself anymore. Aside from Sean and my friends, I'm really not sure where I'm going, but I have this increasing feeling like these last few years in DC are just like sitting in a waiting room... waiting for what I don't know.

Anybody else know what I'm talking about?

Into the Fire

2009-08-26T09:52:00.000-04:00

Here's an old song that popped into my head one morning this week so some reason. I've always loved Sarah McLachlan's voice (and she hails from Halifax, a city near and dear to my heart), plus the song is about fire.

Catching a Show, and Putting on One

2009-08-22T16:50:00.005-04:00

I love days like this sometime, thunderstormy sleepy days, sipping tea, listening to BBC or CBC, catching up on sleep and all those other things I missed during the week.

What a week! A crazy business trip to Chicago (complete with delays at O'Hare coming and going) and lot going on at work. Sean got some free VIP tickets to a show at Wolftrap for last night. The opening band was Celtic-rock group Carbon Leaf, who I had heard of, and other a band from Newfoundland called Great Big Sea. They both put on a great show, and we had excellent box seats.

Last night, too, was a massive thunderstorm. I was worried the show might be cancelled, but when we pulled into the parking lot, the show was definitely on. The was a huge downpour, so Sean and I decided to wait it out in his car (being a diva, I can't get wet). So one thing led to another, that involved me putting my car seat all the way back... you figure it out. Rainy night, alone in Sean's car... or so we thought. Until Sean looked up and we realized there were people in this minivan watching us the whole time. I've never wanted to crawl under the floorboards and die like that before. Ugh... But I can laugh about it a little now. You want a show - we'll give you a performance!

No We Can't?

2009-08-21T09:05:00.000-04:00

Here's a great article in The Advocate (hat-tip to my fellow witch F out in Colorado for sending this to me) about Obama's epic fail when it comes to gay equality. It even features the fabulous Bruce Bastian.

Read on...

Bite Me

2009-08-20T19:17:00.004-04:00

[As featured on D-listed]

Now, I'm a Twilight fan (it's a shitty vampire story, I know. Correction: I'm a Robert Pattinson fan). But this is over the top... a Twilight inspired sex toy. Lovesit!

The Vamp!

Updated by popular request... Yes the The Vamp retains hot and cold temperature. Toss it in the fridge for that authentic experience.

JUST IN TIME FOR HALLOWEEN! Who doesn't love those dark and mysterious vamps on the screen and in the books we all thumb through lustfully? That's what we thought. For those of us who fantasize about being spellbound and tantalized by the forbidden comes The Vamp. We promise this vamp won't be the only thing coming for you in the night.

The Vamp is a realistic form dildo based appropriately on our Sire's design but with a deathly pale flesh tone reminiscent of the new moon's glow. Since it's a Tantus toy, The Vamp is made from Tantus' own unique blend of 100% Ultra-Premium Silicone. Don't be surprised if this toy seduces you, its long sleek shaft and deliciously ridged head calling to you in the twilight. But don't save this for just nocturnal escapades, try taking our Vamp out in the sunlight and watch him sparkle.

Drunk(y) Driving

2009-08-18T11:07:00.001-04:00

Attention pedestrians and drivers of the world...

I've heard it on good authority that Drunky McDrunkerson has purchased a car.

Seriously - where is a DUI checkpoint when you need one?!?!

And you know I am totally waiting for that drunk driving mugshot. Oh please, God, let that find it's way to my inbox, oh pleaseeee. I swear I'll go to church every day and stop being an athiest.

Actually, as the survivor of a crash caused by a drunk driver, I take this sort of stuff seriously. Be careful, Drunky!

Chic-a-go

2009-08-15T11:08:00.000-04:00

This Monday, I am off to a bizness trip to Chicago! Blog more when I get back. Or maybe I'll blog from there, who knows!

DILF Wednesdays: Brady Brings Teh Pretteh

2009-08-12T09:05:00.001-04:00

Sean look-alike and third husband (behind Anderson and Prince Harry), Tom Brady, is this week's eye candy. He's back playing again for the Patriots this season after several knee surgeries (something I know all too well about) and having babies (not something I know too well yet). He's featured in this month's Details magazine where he blabs about football, some random Brazilian woman who claims she's his wife (whatevah). But mostly he just brings le sighs. Sigh...

Finally Getting with the Times

2009-08-10T08:37:00.001-04:00

So I've finally decided to join the 21st Century and break down and get an iPhone! I don't know I hesitated for so long... I swear, if it was possible to have a rotary cell phone, I would've had one.

Alas, I'm looking forward to the new mobile - and don't worry, my number is staying the same.

The Suburban Boring Couple

2009-08-09T11:56:00.003-04:00

I've been absolutely exhausted lately with my new job and stuff, so while I've thought about blogging, I really haven't the last few weeks. It's August in DC, which means sticky heat and with the new job I haven't really been able to get away. Plus, I've had a convention going on at work, which was a lot of work, so it's over and hopefully things will slow down!

Admittedly these last few lazy weekends, Sean and I have been very "suburban and boring." Don't get me wrong, it's actually been quite nice. And that's not to say I haven't done anything on the weekends, though. Weekend before last I went with some of Sean's friends out to the mountains to visit wineries. His friend Scott introduced us to this wonderful places called Bluemont Vineyards. It's very picturesque, located on the slop of a high mountain, with views over the valley below. They had food and music - it was really nice! I would love to go back. I forgot my camera, but I'll have some pictures in the future!

Sean also introduced me last weekend to Afghan cuisine, which I'd never had before. He took me to this great place in Bailey's Crossroads called Bamian Afghan Cuisine. I'd compare the food to a cross between Indian and Middle Eastern flavors (which makes sense, geographically). I really liked it, and would love to go back! I wonder if I can mimic some of the recipes at home?

Week One

2009-07-23T19:37:00.003-04:00

I haven't updated in a few days - been busy, busy with new stuff. I had a wonderful weekend before starting the new job. I got to see my friend M's new place (very nice!). Saturday night, Sean and I had dinner over there for some wonderful fondue (M - I'm eagerly awaiting the recipe!) and I followed that course with a "Mexican-style chocolate fondue" I was inspired by from an Emirile Lagasse recipe (recipe below). Though, I forgot to use that fabulous electric fondue pot Drunky McDrunkerson gave me... I swear it was almost worth dating him just for that Cuisinart fondue set! I'm so shallow...

Sean took my mind off the impending first day at the new job by taking me to a great Vietnamese place near his house (Taste of Saigon) and catching the new Harry Potter movie at Tyson's. It was so-so... as typical I find myself rooting for the bad guys anyway, and Draco Malfoy is quite cute in this one, in that brooding bad-boy sorta way. Though the ginger one, Ron, is growing up to be quite cute too, and I usually don't say that about redheads (don't worry Prince Harry, you're still the #1 ginger in my book).

So the new job has gone very well so far! Granted, this is only week one and it seems like there is much work ahead, but I am glad to be moving into a new chapter of my life, and glad to be away from my last job (the the payout in the end was a nice little bonus! - Perhaps Sean and I will be in Costa Rica or Spain later for a winter getaway).

Mexican-style Chocolate Fondue

2 cups brewed coffee
1 vanilla bean (or, subst. w/ 1 tbsp vanilla extract)
3 cinnamon sticks
1 cup milk
1 cup heavy cream
1/2 teaspoon ground chipotle pepper*
8 oz Mexican chocolate (or subt. w. semi-sweet dark)
8 oz semi-sweet chocolate

Heat the brewed coffee, vanilla, and cinnamon sticks in fondue pot and simmer on hi, bringing to a boil. Boil until liquid has reduced to about 1/4 cup (about 10 mins). Add the milk, cream, and chipotle to the pot. Lower heat to medium and simmer. Slowly stir in chocolate, and simmer and stir until thickened.

*In vising southern Mexico, I found that using chillies in chocolate is a very popular and ancient technique going back to the Aztecs and Mayas... it gives a characteristic kick that is quite nice. Trust me, it's good... just don't overdo it.

Relaxation and Detoxification

2009-07-17T15:06:00.002-04:00

I've had such a great week of resting after leaving my last job. The week is flying by too fast though - I start my new job this coming Monday. I'm happy to be starting the new position, but I have to admit I wish I had longer vacation!

This week I went to Rehoboth Beach with Sean. So funny story I have to confess... I was searching for a good hotel on my last day at PFLAG, and colleagues kept coming into my office to say their goodbyes and such. I guess it distracted me, because I made the reservations not really paying attention. As many know, beach resorts fill up very fast in the summer, so it's always a pain to find vacancies.

So, fast-forward to the morning we were going to the beach, Sean calls me to tell me he was driving over to pick me and was 10 minutes away. Only then did I bother to look at the print-out of the reservations and realize... I had booked the wrong dates. So there I was in panic-mode, calling the hotel to see if they had vacancies for that day (I could almost hear them snickering as they said no). I was desperately Googling "Rehoboth hotels" in hopes I could find something, anything, with Sean none the wiser.

To my credit, I found one place that still had vacancies. Booked it, and had the whole matter settled by the time Sean pulled up.

Aside from the water being cold (it was no Mexico, let's put it that way) we had a really great time, and it was nice being away from here (even if half the DC "power gays" were there anyway). My only regret was coming home. I wish summer vacations could last forever.

So Long, Farewell...

2009-07-10T10:08:00.002-04:00

Auf Wiedersehen!

Today's my last day at this job! I'm so thrilled. Now begins my time before I start my new job, a bit of a "staycation" though Sean and I may venture to Rehoboth at some point.

Hugs, and thanks again to everyone for their help!

Fiest

2009-07-09T22:05:00.001-04:00

In honor of a very pretty full moon...

Fiest's "My Moon, My Man"

The Thaim of My Life

2009-07-08T09:59:00.000-04:00

I love Thai food, but for the longest time I’ve always had a hard time getting the flavors just right, or finding the right ingredients (like, for example, tamarind paste or fresh lemongrass). There’s one particular sauce at Thai Regent on 18th St that I love, called Kra Prao that goes nicely with seafood or chicken. They have a lovely soft-shelled crab in Kra Prao I highly recommend. Anyway, here’s a homemade version that came out very close in taste I was very happy with…

*Make sure you use Thai basil, not the European basil we’re used to in Italian food. They are very different in taste, and it makes all the difference, trust me!

Chicken Kra Prao

2 chicken breasts, cubed
1 handful of Thai basil leaves, washed
4 cloves garlic, minced
2 Thai red chilies, seeded and finely chopped
1 ½ tbsp Thai fish sauce
3 tbsp dark soy sauce
1 tsp sugar
3 tbsp vegetable oil

In a wok, heat oil and fry garlic and chilies until the garlic is golden. Add the chicken and stir-fry until cooked. In bowl, mix fish sauce, soy sauce and sugar. Add the mixture to the wok and stir-fry for about 5 minutes. About halfway through, begin folding in the Thai basil leaves. Serve with jasmine rice.

The Joys of Being a Lame Duck

2009-07-07T11:49:00.003-04:00

So this is my last week at my current job. I start my new job on the 20th, later this month. That gives me a wondrous week in between to relax, detox... maybe go to the beach?

I'm already beyond "checked out" and am really doing nothing... it's wonderful! Except, I'd rather be sitting by my pool but I digress. It's really nice to not have the job-hunt stress anymore, and many thanks again to my friends and my very patient boyfriend for all of the support!

When Enablers Enable...

2009-07-01T14:42:00.002-04:00

You know, this whole Michael Jackson tragedy from last week got me thinking. The more details emerge, the more it becomes clear Michael spent the better part of his life surrounded by enablers, who didn't really care about him at all. And that, I think, is the saddest part of all.

I mean, I see parallels with certain people I know... like, say, "Drunky McDrunkerson." He's surrounded by lots of "important" people and "A-list gays" - all of whom he considers his "friends."

But the truth, of course, is that if they were really his friends then they wouldn't let him sink to his present obesity, and they wouldn't encourage him to continue drinking as an alcoholic. They are not friends. They are enablers.

Real friends, the moral of this posting is, will help a friend get the help they need. They won't just stand by and watch a person self-destruct, be it drugs, booze, overeating etc.

Just a thought...

Happy Canada Day

2009-07-01T14:37:00.002-04:00

To all my friends up north, Happy Canada Day! May it be filled with Mounties, Maple, and Molsons!

My Lady Gaga Obsession Conitnues...

2009-06-27T18:29:00.001-04:00

Michael Jackson is Dead

2009-06-26T12:03:00.002-04:00

The universe just doesn't feel right... RIP

Attention Fellow Hos of DC/VA/MD:

2009-06-26T11:58:00.004-04:00

Dreamy McDreamerson, aka Paul Rudd is apparently filming a movie in DC and has been spotted around Adams Morgan.

Paul, if you need a break after a long day of shooting, I can help you relax...

Sean, no need to get jealous, you'll always be my Top Chef!

Confessions of an Enabler

2009-06-26T11:47:00.003-04:00

You know, it's been hard lately trying not to fall off the non-smoking wagon. I had a moment of weakness at a club in SLC this past weekend. Being buzzed enough around people who were all smoking gave me the bright idea to buy a pack of cigarettes.

Now, Sean was a smoker when I first met him. I quit many years ago, and have only had the occasional puff since then. These days, Sean tries to hide his smoking from me, which I find amusing since it's not like I don't know about it. Anyway, I made him take the pack because I can't have them around me or I will start smoking again. I've been fighting the urge to smoke all week since. Don't worry, I'm not going to start again.

Speaking of enablers....

I saw "Drunky McDrunkerson" walking down U Street a week or so ago. My friends and I were in shock. I couldn't even say anything, when I saw how far he's let himself go. Seriously D-Mac, you're breaking my heart (... if I had one to break). He clearly isn't being healthy, and it looks like more than just booze and pAArtying. It's really not even funny at this point. I can't even joke about it, it's quite sad actually. I hope he gets the help he needs!

Flipping Out

2009-06-23T10:41:00.001-04:00

Flipping a table.... so tempting sometimes.

This is basically me... if I was a housewife from New Jersey... (I love the fake orange spray tans, too)

Just Because...

2009-06-18T16:14:00.004-04:00

Because I can, and I need something soothing to the eyes...

Prince Harry is clearly getting the helicopter ready to personally fly me to Utah. Phillip and Louis - get the landing pad ready!

"I'm still drying my nail polish, Harry. Just wait, will you?"

Heading West...

2009-06-18T16:10:00.003-04:00

I'm off to Utah this weekend to visit friends and attend the HRC dinner in Salt Lake City this weekend. See you all when I get back!

Pride for So Many Reasons...

2009-06-14T20:04:00.002-04:00

I am now home from a wonderful Pride weekend, and feel so much happier than I did at the start of this week. So many of my problems have found resolution (never underestimate the power of being a bitch when negotiating) and I have had Sean and my friends behind me lending moral support every step of the way!

Look forward to more frequent postings, and a fun-filled summer!

Turn Around Brighteyes, Turn Around...

2009-06-05T09:51:00.000-04:00

I love this -it's a spoof of my favorite 80's cheese love ballad, "Total Eclipse of the Heart."

Wake Me up When June Ends

2009-06-04T21:39:00.002-04:00

So yeah, I know I haven't been keeping up with The Poison Pen the way I should have, having needed to divert my energies elsewhere lately. This does not, of course, means things have not been happening.

I've been a bit more reclusive than usual - though that is slowly changing. I have been spending a lot of my free time with Sean, as he's been a huge pillar of support (as have my friends, too). Honestly, sometimes I'm just so exhausted all I feel like doing is having dinner with Sean, but lately I've been coming around. I went out the other night with friends to 80's night at Cobalt, I've been out for dinner and drinks with friends a lot to.

Oh, and before I forget, my favorite Greek place finally did open up a location in the city, so it's no longer necessary for those of you in the District to trek out to Rockville anymore. The new Cava is on 8th street SE, a block down from Banana Cafe in Eastern Market.If you go anywhere for dinner this month, go to Cava, I can't sing their praises enough. Actually on second thought, don't go there, because you'll take up tables for me and my friends! ;P

I'll let you know how things progress, of course! Thanks to everyone who's had my back this last month! XOXOXO

Not My First Time at the Rodeo...

2009-05-25T22:26:00.003-04:00

I'm sitting here admiring the roses Sean surprised me with this weekend. i want to say a special thank you to all my friends, and of course Sean, for all of their support and such through an interesting patch in my life... I will blog about everything soon once everything falls into place, one way or another.

In the meantime, I have a feeling this week is going to be a "channeling Joan Crawford" week...

Stay Tuned...

2009-05-03T21:58:00.003-04:00

Due to some major things going on in my life right now, I haven't had any time for blogging like normal - I'll be back as soon as I can. but in the meantime there's work to be done, and spells to be cast. Send me your good vibes!

"Crazy Possesive"

2009-04-30T18:54:00.002-04:00

Ok, so this is a bit of a Britney Spear rip-off, but Kaci's song "Crazy Possesive" has some awesome lyrics...

"Touch my man again and I'm a f*** you up!"

LOVE IT!

A Glimpse of My Future...

2009-04-27T22:27:00.001-04:00

One day I will be doing a reality show with my adopted daughter... this is how I imagine it will go, plastic surgery face and all.

Video Recaps | Full Episodes | Webisodes

I've Wasted Time in Worse Ways...

2009-04-25T18:04:00.002-04:00

If you're bored, click here to go to an Adidas website I found today where you can click on men to take their shirts off for you... I think it has something to do with soccer. I dunno, it has some hot guys though!

"Just Don't Call it a Comeback!"

2009-04-24T11:30:00.003-04:00

I’ve been very busy since getting back home so I haven’t been keeping up with my blog as much as I usually do. I want to say a HUGE thanks, first off, to Margo and Fred (or should I say Ursula and King Triton) for opening their house for my birthday party. They went so out to make it a special surprise. Thanks to all of my friends who were there – I love all of the gifts, including the AeroGarden which I am just setting up in my place. And thanks to Sean for going out of his way to cook all of that wonderful food.

Last week I spent my (actual) birthday with Sean travelling to Toronto, and the surrounding region including Niagara Falls, which I had never seen before. It was absolutely amazing. I love Toronto, as I mentioned before. Canada is like a mirror image of what America should be like. And Toronto, as Canada’s largest city, is a mirror image of what ours – New York – should be like. Clean, polite people, low crime. I think I sold Sean on the idea of maybe living there one day. Not that I had any side motives in visiting!

Sean kept leaving little surprises around our hotel room for me to find. For my birthday dinner, Sean surprised me and took me to this beautiful vineyard restaurant in the Ontario wine country called Hillebrand Estates. This really ranks up there with one of the best meals I’ve ever had. The service and food was outstanding... from start to finish every course was creative and intriguing, and I highly recommend it to anyone visiting the area. Also really nice were the ice wineries around Niagara-on-the-Lake. I love ice wine, and picked up some to take home for special occasions.

It was a perfect trip! Kind of unusual considering we usually go someplace tropical. It feels weird being back at work – I’m already looking forward to another vacation.

And in case I don’t get a chance to post it, an early Happy Birthday to my fellow witch, Hortencia Carter! All the best, chica! Missing you here in this blasted city.

Over the Falls

2009-04-20T22:18:00.004-04:00

Sean and I are back from a relaxing and fun time in the Toronto area. Between this week and all the fun I had last week for my birthday celebrations, I am really dreading getting "back to reality." It's been such a special week...

I love Toronto... it's like New York, only cleaner and more polite.

Click here to see teh Canadialand photos.

What lies at the end of the rainbow?

We do!

Off to Canadialand

2009-04-15T11:09:00.002-04:00

Dear Poison Pen readers, Adam is off to Toronto & the Niagara region for my (actual) birthday with Sean, so I will see you all when I get back!

Love Story

2009-04-15T10:27:00.002-04:00

Taylor Swift - "Love Story"

I think Sean and I have come to a consensus that, for better or worse, this is "our song." It's always on the radio when we're in the car together, and it's just cheesy enough to be a couple's song.

"You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess..." I'll be the princess, of course. LOL.

Taylor Swift: Love Story

Survival of the Fittest / Least Stupid

2009-04-15T09:01:00.000-04:00

So this earlier this week a woman in Germany decided to jump into a polar bear habitat the zoo.

This is what they call "natural selection," folks.

HAHAHAAH. Hey, with all the global warming, I say the polar bears deserve to even the score a little, don't you?